In This Article:

• Why we all carry both light and shadow within us.
• How small choices feed either compassion or conflict.
• The power of attention in shaping our emotions.
• How media fuels our perception of human nature.
• Practical ways to grow compassion daily.

Which Are You Choosing? Your Angel Wings or Your Horns?

Recently, I’ve been in conflict with someone in my life. When I first met her, she seemed so sweet. But over time, I began seeing another side—one that wasn’t loving or compassionate.

The other day, I happened to watch her in conversation with someone else. She was smiling, gracious, warm. For a moment, I remembered the sweetness I had forgotten. All I’d been noticing in my own interactions with her were the “devil's horns,” not the “angel's wings.”

The Two Sides in All of Us

Of course, I realize we all have both aspects within us. For reasons that might be karma, personality differences, or simply how certain people bring out certain traits, we sometimes show one side more than the other. Some encounters bring out our inner angel; others bring out our inner devil. And while we always have the power to choose our response, our choices are often influenced by buried emotions, old wounds, and unexamined judgments.

Sometimes the “horns” shoot out before our “wings” have time to unfurl. Later, we may regret our words or recognize that we spoke from our lowest self, not our highest. But this is part of our learning in the School of Life. Each situation offers a choice—sometimes conscious, sometimes not—between the angelic part of ourselves and the devilish one.

Feeding the Good Wolf

You may know the Native American story about the two wolves inside us: one good, one bad. A child asks his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?” The grandfather replies, “The one you feed.” Whether we call it angel and devil, good wolf and bad wolf, or—as Lincoln put it—“the better angels of our nature,” the part of ourselves that thrives is the part we nurture and express.

Every encounter is an opportunity. Will we grow our little devil horns, or will we let our angelic wings appear? Will we choose compassion over resentment, understanding over revenge, acceptance over anger?

The Role of Media in What We See

This choice applies not just to individuals but to the collective. Unfortunately, the media—both social and traditional—tends to highlight negativity, anger, and conflict. This constant diet of darkness can give us the false impression that the “devil” side of humanity is winning. But that’s not the whole truth. Every day, countless acts of kindness and compassion happen, yet they rarely make the headlines. We hear more about outrage than generosity, more about division than unity.

The danger is that the more we focus on negativity, the more we feed it—not just in the world, but in ourselves. Likewise, when we focus on kindness, we help spread that energy, even in ways we can’t always see. It matters.

What Energy Are You Spreading?

In my situation with this woman, I noticed that the more I thought about her with judgment and anger, the worse things became. I was feeding the angry wolf between us. I was giving energy to the devil instead of the angel. That made me realize: our choices don’t just show up in our actions—they also shape the energy we carry in our thoughts, into conversations, the stories we tell, and the way we talk about others and the world.

We are like pebbles tossed into a pond. The ripples of our energy—positive or negative—spread far beyond what we can see. In a time when society seems to teeter between love and fear, we must choose our “pebbles” carefully. Even subtle contributions matter.

The Daily Battle Within

This isn’t a theoretical idea—it’s a moment-to-moment reality. The loud voices of fear, anger, and defensiveness often drown out the quieter voice of compassion and acceptance. The battle is within us: which thoughts will we focus on, and which will we let go? Every choice to respond with love feeds more love into the world. Every choice to react with anger adds to the world’s anger.

We won’t always get it right. Sometimes we’ll feed the wrong wolf. But like a child learning to walk, we can stand up again, dust ourselves off, and choose love in the next moment. Each choice is a new chance.

Raising the Child Within

It might help to think of your inner reactions as a child you’re raising. You teach this child the values of love, compassion, and care—not by shaming mistakes, but by encouraging better choices. And in doing so, you grow both your wings and the world’s.

So the next time you’re faced with a choice between anger and love, ask yourself: Which energy do I want to feed in the world? More rage, or more understanding? More division, or more compassion? The more we choose love, the greater its force—not only in ourselves but across the planet.

Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal empowerment, and inner well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of love. joy, and creativity.

Related Book:

Arriving at Your Own Door: 108 Lessons in Mindfulness
by Jon Kabat-Zinn.

Within these 108 selections lie messages of profound wisdom in a contemporary and practical form that can lead to both healing and transformation. We so urgently need to rotate in consciousness in order to safeguard what precious sanity is available to us on this planet. How we carry ourselves will determine the direction the world takes because, in a very real way, we are the world we inhabit. Our world is continuously being shaped by our participation in everything around us and within us through mindfulness. This is the great work of awareness. Welcome to the threshold . . . to the fullness of arriving at your own door!

Info/Order book. Also available as a Kindle edition.

Article Recap

We all carry both “wings” and “horns,” just as the old story tells of the two wolves. The one we feed is the one that grows. Each moment offers us the choice to add to the world’s anger or to its compassion. By choosing love, we change both our own life and the greater whole.

#choosinglove #innercompassion #mindfulness #emotionalintelligence #selfgrowth
#positivity #kindness #innerpeace #selfawareness #personaldevelopment